Introduction 1

1 Sex 4

#1 Men have a stronger libido than women 5

#2 Hooking up in college is bad for women 12

#3 All marriages have been consummated 20

#4 All marriages are sexually active 24

2 Attraction and Courtship 30

#5 Being smooth is the best way to pick someone up 31

#6 Opposites attract 42

#7 People know what they want in a partner 47

3 Online Dating 52

#8 Having access to innumerable online profiles of potential partners increases the likelihood of finding Mr. or Ms. Right 53

#9 Meeting potential partners electronically prior to meeting them in person decreases the chances of a successful relationship 59

#10 Couples who are “matched” by online dating services are more likely to have satisfying relationships 66

4 Same‐Sex Relationships 71

#11 The gender to which people are attracted is stable (or: the gender to which people are attracted is fluid) 73

#12 There are no differences between same‐sex relationships and heterosexual relationships 80

#13 Children raised by other‐sex couples are better off than children raised by same‐sex couples 85

5 Predicting Success and Failure in Relationships 92

#14 Living together before marriage is a good way to determine whether you’re with the right person 94

#15 Premarital counseling or relationship education programs prevent discord and divorce 100

#16 Good communication is the key to a happy relationship 109

#17 The key to a good relationship is knowing how to solve your problems 114

#18 Having children brings couples closer 121

#19 Stress is bad for relationships 128

#20 Supporting your partner will improve your relationship 133

6 Differences, Discord, and Dissolution 142

#21 Men are from Mars, women are from Venus 143

#22 Only men perpetrate violence in intimate relationships 150

#23 Marital therapy doesn’t work 156

#24 The first cut is the deepest 161

#25 Things will improve once you’re divorced 167

Coda 174

References 175

Author Index 229

Subject Index 244