{"product_id":"exs-and-nos-the-breakup-advice-you-dont-want-to-hear-paperback-softback-9781394324132","title":"Ex's and No's; The Breakup Advice You Don't Want to Hear (Paperback \/ softback) 9781394324132","description":"\u003cfont face=\"Georgia\"\u003e\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"6\"\u003eEx's and No's\u003c\/font\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\r\n\u003cfont size=\"5\"\u003eThe Breakup Advice You Don't Want to Hear\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cp\u003ePraise for \u003ci\u003eEx’s and No’s\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e“This has become my go-to resource for clients navigating heartbreak. Cole beautifully combines science, empathy, and actionable tools to help you heal, grow, and avoid the painful mistakes that keep so many stuck. It’s not just about getting over your ex (or getting them back)—it’s about coming back even better than before and stepping into your best self through the process.”\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Morgan Starr-Riestis\u003c\/b\u003e, LMHC, PATP\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e“Cole Zesiger is the coach you want in your corner after a breakup. In \u003ci\u003eEx's and No's: The Breakup Advice You Don't Want to Hear\u003c\/i\u003e, he delivers his trademark no-nonsense advice—hard-hitting yet deeply comforting. Cole reminds you he's been there too. And like him, you can reclaim your life, build with strength, and come out even better on the other side. A must read for anyone in the thick of heartbreak!”\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu\u003c\/b\u003e, co-authors of \u003ci\u003eHow to Be Dateable: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Person and Falling in Love\u003c\/i\u003e and co-hosts of the hit podcast \u003ci\u003eDateable\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e“Cole has an amazing way of being pragmatic about heartbreak while still navigating the emotional complexities you may face after a heartbreak. It’s a great step-by-step tool on how to approach the many challenges you may face during the heartbreak process. If you’re lost in the process of a heartbreak, consider using this as a companion on your journey.”\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Jaymen Chang\u003c\/b\u003e, author of \u003ci\u003eI love this version of myself that you brought out\u003c\/i\u003e and creator of @thebreakupjournalpdf on Instagram \u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e“I was blown away by this book. I expected something good—but not something this well-researched, insightful, and genuinely funny. As a couples therapist with over two decades of experience, I was struck by the depth of Cole's understanding of relationships. His ability to blend humor, vulnerability, and solid psychological principles makes this a book I’d recommend to anyone who cares about improving their connection with others.”\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Tony Overbay\u003c\/b\u003e, LMFT and host of \u003ci\u003eThe Virtual Couch\u003c\/i\u003e podcast\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e“Cole wrote the book I want to give my personal friends and family members when they go through heartbreak. It’s so practical and incredibly useful!”\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003e—Trevor Hansen\u003c\/b\u003e, LMFT, @theartofhealingbytrevor on Instagram\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"4\"\u003eCole Zesiger (Author)\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003e9781394324132, Wiley\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003ePaperback \/ softback, published 5 February 2026\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003e256 pages\u003cbr\u003e22.4 x 15.2 x 2 cm, 0.295 kg\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\u003cp align=\"justify\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eHeal your broken heart with compassionate, cathartic advice on life and relationships\u003c\/b\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eEx's and No's: The Breakup Advice You Don't Want to Hear\u003c\/i\u003e is a compassionate guide to healing broken hearts. This book is a true companion to walk you through your heartbreak, serving as both a shoulder to cry on and an encouraging aid to restore your confidence and maximize your chances of building and maintaining a healthy relationship. With personal anecdotes from an author who's been through multiple relationship breakdowns, this book will help readers understand their emotions, take accountability for their actions, identify good and bad relationship habits, focus on relationship intentions and priorities, learn to forgive, and discover how to date with joy and purpose again. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eReaders will also find insights on: \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e \u003cli\u003eThe reasons why people break up, from drained emotional bank accounts to sabotage and familiarity\u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eThe necessity of going no contact, and what that entails beyond basic communications\u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eWays to avoid unhealthy distractions so you can truly feel your emotions\u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eSmall wins and their power in helping you get through the day\u003c\/li\u003e \u003cli\u003eThe role of forgiveness and gratitude in the healing process\u003c\/li\u003e \u003c\/ul\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eEx's and No's\u003c\/i\u003e is the definitive roadmap to turn your pain into power, your heartache into action, and your breakup into the beginning of a joyful new chapter in your life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003e\u003cp\u003eIntroduction: My Story and Why I Wrote a Book About Breakups xiii\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 1 Why Your Brain Thinks Love Is Life- or- Death 1\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eEvolutionary Biology 3\u003cbr\u003eChildhood 4\u003cbr\u003eOur Three Primal Fears 6\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 2 No Contact (Creating the Environment to Heal) 15\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe No Contact Rule 16\u003cbr\u003eNo Contact to Get an Ex Back 22\u003cbr\u003eNo Contact to Move On 23\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 3 What Kills Good Relationships? 39\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eCategory 1: Differences in Attachment Styles 40\u003cbr\u003eAttachment and Adult Romantic Relationships 44\u003cbr\u003eAttachment Theory in Breakups 55\u003cbr\u003eThe Anxious- Avoidant Trap 55\u003cbr\u003eCategory 2: A Mismanaged Emotional Bank Account 59\u003cbr\u003eCategory 3: Differences in Goals or Values 61\u003cbr\u003eCategory 4: Self- Sabotage 63\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 4 How to Rebuild a Relationship That Lasts 69\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMove On or Wait for Them? 69\u003cbr\u003eCommon Mistakes 88\u003cbr\u003eShould You Ever Reach Out to Your Ex? 94\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 5 Crossing the River of Grief 97\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eFacing Your Pain 100 Modulating Healthy Distr(action) 102\u003cbr\u003eThinking Errors 104\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 6 The Life- Changing Power of Small Wins 117\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMicro Wins 119\u003cbr\u003eLife Map 123\u003cbr\u003eSay Yes to Things That Scare You 129\u003cbr\u003eAnchoring Hope in the Future 130\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 7 How to Stop Falling for People Who Can't Love You Back 133\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eInner Beliefs 135\u003cbr\u003eYour Beliefs Choose Your Relationships 140\u003cbr\u003eReliance on Others: Anxious vs. Avoidant 141\u003cbr\u003eLetter to Little You 145\u003cbr\u003eDaily Tracking 147\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 8 Focusing Outward (Why Self- Care Is Not Enough) 151\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Science of Connection 152\u003cbr\u003eYour Pain Qualifies You to Help Others 154\u003cbr\u003eConnection as a Healing Tool 155\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 9 Forgiveness: Setting Yourself Free 161\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eForgiving with Boundaries 163\u003cbr\u003eForgiving Others 164\u003cbr\u003eForgiving Yourself 167\u003cbr\u003eForgiveness Is Free 171\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 10 What If This Was the Best Thing That's Ever Happened to You? 175\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAdjusting the Meaning and the Sunk Cost Bias 179\u003cbr\u003eReleasing Control 182\u003cbr\u003eReframing Relationship Failure 184\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 11 Dating After Heartbreak, Without Losing Yourself Again 187\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThe Dangers of Dating Too Soon 189\u003cbr\u003eHow Do You Know When You Are Ready? 193\u003cbr\u003eShould I Date If I Still Think About My Ex? 194\u003cbr\u003eBeginning to Date 195\u003cbr\u003ePlanning Dates 196\u003cbr\u003eFeeling Numb 197\u003cbr\u003eOvercoming Emotional Numbness 198\u003cbr\u003eSetting Yourself Up for Success 203\u003cbr\u003eAttachment Styles in Early Dating 203\u003cbr\u003eDiscussing Past Relationships and Partners 208\u003cbr\u003eFinding People to Date 209\u003cbr\u003eLook Where You Want to Find Them 211\u003cbr\u003eYour Dating Compass: Primary and Secondary Characteristics 212\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eChapter 12 Lined with Gold 217\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eDear Reader 221\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003eAcknowledgments 223\u003cbr\u003eAbout the Author 225\u003cbr\u003eIndex 227\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cfont size=\"3\"\u003eSubject Areas: Religion \u0026amp; beliefs [\u003ca title=\"See our other books on Religion \u0026amp; beliefs\" href=\"https:\/\/freshlyprintedbooks.co.uk\/search?q=%22Religion%20\u0026amp;%20beliefs%20%5BHR%5D%22\"\u003eHR\u003c\/a\u003e]\u003c\/font\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\r\n\r\n\r\n\u003c\/font\u003e","brand":"Jossey-Bass","offers":[{"title":"Brand New","offer_id":52453505728792,"sku":"9781394324132","price":12.69,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0730\/2037\/5320\/files\/9781394324132.jpg?v=1785285358","url":"https:\/\/freshlyprintedbooks.co.uk\/products\/exs-and-nos-the-breakup-advice-you-dont-want-to-hear-paperback-softback-9781394324132","provider":"Freshly Printed Books","version":"1.0","type":"link"}